What to do about my sister

[dizzyme]

Me and my sister grew up close. Nothing sexual. Then we grew apart and didn't have anything to do with each other for awhile. But we're starting to get along now. For the last few years I've had strong sexual feelings for her. So would it be to early to try "flirting" with her. I know shes just a regular girl but my flirting style isn't subtle enough to use on her giving the delicate situation. So I could use some advice on how to do it or how to get her out of my head.

[bongsewer]

Me and my sister grew up close. Nothing sexual. Then we grew apart and didn't have anything to do with each other for awhile. But we're starting to get along now. For the last few years I've had strong sexual feelings for her. So would it be to early to try "flirting" with her. I know shes just a regular girl but my flirting style isn't subtle enough to use on her giving the delicate situation. So I could use some advice on how to do it or how to get her out of my head.

This may be an old topic but I'm in this EXACT situation. (me 25 she 23). My sister in a relationship that's pretty rocky; sometimes I guiltily wish she would break up with her boyfriend and turn to me-not just physically, but for a relationship. She lives with her boyfriend but asks me to spend a lot of time with her, but I have a feeling that it's just because she enjoys my company and not because she's reciprocating my feelings. Anyone who's been in a similar situation have some advice? I'm feeling like I'm going to have to give up and move on, but I don't want to...

[bi-poly-sailors]

Me and my sister...grew apart and didn't have anything to do with each other for awhile. But we're starting to get along now. So would it be to early to try "flirting" with her.

You had nothing to do with each other for a while, so your relationship effectively ended for a time and is just now being reopened and renewed.

Yes, it would be too early to start flirting.

While I cannot say that it would be doomed to failure, there's a high risk that not only would you not get to be her lover, you wouldn't even get to be her brother again.

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Be her friend. Be her brother. Develop emotional closeness and trust.

Then take a look at a sexual relationship somewhere down the road.

Good luck.

Hal

PS: I have seen so many guys get derailed by their own impatience, so let go of your attachments to being her lover. Paradoxically, perhaps, when you stop trying to make it happen then it is more likely to happen.

[bi-poly-sailors]

This may be an old topic but I'm in this EXACT situation. (me 25 she 23). My sister in a relationship that's pretty rocky; sometimes I guiltily wish she would break up with her boyfriend and turn to me-not just physically, but for a relationship. She lives with her boyfriend but asks me to spend a lot of time with her, but I have a feeling that it's just because she enjoys my company and not because she's reciprocating my feelings. Anyone who's been in a similar situation have some advice? I'm feeling like I'm going to have to give up and move on, but I don't want to...

I haven't been in a similar situation, but that's never stopped me from saying what I think. :D

Firstly, there's nothing wrong with wishing for anything, including your sister breaking up with someone. We haven't yet reached the point of having thought police patrolling our internal musings, so try to release that guilt.

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She asks you to spend a lot of time with her? Well, spend it already!

Be there for her. Be her rock, her friend and a sypathetic/empathetic brother.

Really listen to her.

Do enjoyable things with her so she accumulates ever-growing heaps o' positive memories and feelings about being with you.

As time goes, you likely will notice some subtle shifts in her attitude toward you, almost as if she were viewing you as she would view A POTENTIAL BOYFRIEND! :D That's when you can start a seduction. (You are paying attention to her attitudes and moods, aren't you?)

Good luck.

Hal